Patty (woodycakes) wrote,

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Shall I dance?

I just watched What a Girl Wants on HBO for the second time and I still enjoyed the film. I'm not exactly a big fan of Amanda Bynes, but Colin Firth was in the movie too so it made it more bearable. I have to say that though I cringed a bit during the movie, it was pretty good.

First off, Daphne -- that's the lead girl -- wasn't just out to get a boy. Although she did manage to snag one. It wasn't the main story. It was nice to see a film aimed at teens that wasn't just focused on the lead girls romantic love life. Her mom was a wedding singer while she worked as a server during the weddings. And everytime the bride would dance with her father, she would feel sad because she didn't know hers (her father that is). So Looking for her birth father was something new (at least from the movies I've watched) and it was really cool that she had to go to the UK.

I love the UK. Lord Dashwood is obviously British and the accents were really nice to listen to. So Daphne finally finds him and at first she acts all irrational and stereotypically American wild child, but then she realizes that she needs to put up a front so that her dad's political aspirations won't get trampled on.

Basically, she changes herself for her father, but she obviously can't take it so she go back to the states. It ends with Daphne finally getting her dance with her father.

Now why all this talk about the movie? Well, it's very odd but it got me thinking. I don't exactly want to dance with my dad in front of a lot of people. I guess it's because I've known of my dad's existence for practically my entire life. My sister had her debut and she danced with my dad. In front of everyone.

Now it's supposedly my turn to dance and I just don't want to. No offense to my dad. I love him, and I'm sure he knows that but he really wants this dance to happen. I told him I would dance with him -- at my wedding. And that is if I do get hitched. The thing is, I love to dance and I love my dad. But the two of them together just doesn't quite fit.

I tried it. During the prom, I wanted to try dancing on a non-group basis, and it felt so weird. It was almost like torture. I looked around me and everyone else (the closely hugging couples -- no we weren't one of them, in fact we were so far away that you could fit a third person in between us) and they looked more than comfortable. I felt strange. I felt as if I was being watched closely.

I don't exactly want to repeat the experience. Especially not on my birthday. I just want to have a nice dinner with my family and not feel any unwanted feelings. Here's the other thing. My birthday is slowly creeping up on me, and my mom is asking me for plans for my "party." The thing is, I really don't know what to do. The debuts I've gone to either involve hotels and pretty dresses (too expensive), or alcohol and lots of guys (I'm not very good with either). So there's not much basis on what my non-existent debut to be will be like.

The guest list is already stressing me and what to do with whoever I do invite is another problem. I don't want to have problems, especially not about my birthday. So I had decided (at least for now) that I won't have a party. I mean, what's the difference of being 18 from turning 17 or 19, right? As long as my parents give me gifts and I get greeted, that's pretty much fine with me. This way, I don't have to worry about anything and I don't have to dance in front of everyone.

Problem solved. Except my mom said that I might regret not having an 18th birthday. Now, I'm doubting what I want. I was fine with the thought of not having one, but now I'm second guessing myself. I have a countdown to graduation, but none for my birthday. I guess it's just not that a big of a deal. So however many days there are to the so called BIG day (my birthday), I guess it's just going to surprise me. Whatever happens, I just wish I'll be truly happy that day.
Tags: movies, my birthday, parents
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