Patty (woodycakes) wrote,

I Could Tell From the Minute I Woke Up, It was Gonna Be a Lonely, Lonely, Lonely, Lonely Day

Big changes happened in May and this past week, my second brother, Pietro left to go to the US, to find a job and hopefully get his citizenship. My family's been petitioned for immigration since I was born and finally three years ago, we got approved. Unfortunately, me and my two siblings in Singapore had aged out. So it's been flying back and forth for the three kids and my parents these past two years to maintain their status.

Finally, my brother graduated from college and now, he's got to stay there for at least 5 years to try and establish citizenship. And though it's only five years, I'm going to miss him a lot. It's not like it's just Singapore that I can get cheap flights to every year to visit him. It's quite far and quite expensive. And though Pietro and I haven't ever been the closey type, he's definitely going to be missed.

I guess, the reason I'm getting really sad is because now, half my siblings are away. And i know it's about time people moved out of the house, but I guess I'm not over how I'm still here (not that I want to leave) and people younger than me are getting up and moving out (though not necessarily out of their own free will).

So really, it's selfishly about me and how things aren't 'starting' for me. I always thought I'd be the one to move out and abroad first. Instead, i'm still in my job (which I like a lot and feel secure-ish), and not living abroad -- which I think is somewhat of a goal for me.

I've sort of relegated myself to being Lady Edith -- the sister who stays behind, and I'm okay with it. But at the back of my head, I'm also wondering if this is all there is for me -- not that it doesn't make me happy, but sometimes I wish there was jut a bit more out there. Some adventure I haven't gone on out of Manila.

But really, wherever life takes me eventually, I just really wish we could all be together again -- not like before -- but sometime soon. Hopefully the holidays or birthday -- hopefully during happy times? If not then, then anytime will do.

Tags: parents, siblings
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