Patty (woodycakes) wrote,

Gossip Girl 02x18: The Age of Dissonance

Blair Wants Revenge!!![Andreas @ LJ]
Oh Gossip Girl, I have missed you so. And though this wasn't exactly as explosive as far as Gossip Girl episodes go, I was just so happy to see it back that I could really care less what they did with it. Next week though, it's gotta get waaaay better.

Still, borrowing a page from the 90210 script wherein suddenly Dan is an actor and Blair is his leading lady and well, things are supposed to be parallel to the play and yet all I'm thinking is why the hell is Chuck NOT in this play and why does his storyline totally not connect to anyone elses!? But oh wait, it sort of does. Right?

The Craziest Nate/Vanessa Misunderstanding Ever
How cute are these two together? I mean really?! I didn't think I would like them this much because apart from each other, I'm not exactly a fan, but together, why does it work for me?!

Nate however, really needs to smarten up. So he hears V getting all giggly with "Julian" on the phone, the obvious Nate reaction would be expect the worst and he totally lives up to his character's personality.

Poor V, left to figure out why the hell Nate is being so distant!? Does she not see how Julian is 'fawning' over her in a non-sexual way and instead in a "I-think-you're-so-pretty-let's-be-BFFs" sort of way? Does no one here still understand that Julian is gay! Guess not.

Nate like ESPN?! NO FREAKING WAY. This totally makes him soooo Vanessa's opposite. I love how the writers have nothing better for these two to fight about. Come on people, give me the scandal you've always promised! I guess this is as gritty as it gets on the Upper East Side CW.

Their making up scene makes my heart melt though. Thank goodness Nate is rich again, because this would not have been as cute if they were cuddling on a mattress on the floor instead of a leather couch while watching The Age of Innocence on his Macbook Pro while possibly eating the pierogis V seems to love.

Dan's Getting Some Home Schooling Love
And still despite the hiatus, I cannot wrap my head around Teacher Rachel falling for Dan. Okay, so maybe yes, but there's just no spark between these two! Where's the 'chemistry'? I would have rooted for this if it were Chuck and some hot teacher, but it's Dan and a NOT hot teacher!!!

Therefore Jenny, DO NOT HELP YOUR BROTHER!!! He's obviously going to get a talking to from Rufus, cause you know that's all Rufus really does anyway. I guess these kids really do never learn which means more drama for us!!!

And of course, Jenny would accidentally drop the note and out Dan and Rachel's rendezvous to Rufus. That's really pretty paper though. Does Dan just happen to stock up on pretty cream stationery wherever he goes? I was expecting torn notebook paper.

Is Jenny the nicest kid sister when she wipes off all her mascara and eyeliner?! I swear, I'd be a bitch to Dan if I were his sister, but Jenny's got unconditional love, y'all. I will try to emulate her good sisterliness. She's gotta get some great karma for this.

You know what would have been hot/sleazy!? If Rachel pounced on Rufus! Now that would be major drama!!! Poor Lily though, but that would have made for a more awesome morning after conversation with his son, rather than the usual.

The usual I'm-grown-up-I-can-make decisions talk that Dan usually gives his dad during breakfast. I swear I can already imagine what Jenny's thinking, "this again?" Yes Jenny, with your brother and your father, it's that again.

Thus the sex in the costume closet happening wasn't as shocking as I'd think it would be just because Dan is a horny little boy and for some reason he is terribly attracted to Rachel. Also, do you notice how Rachel's been wearing extra mini mini-skirts?! Obviously trying to bait the poor innocent boy into her pants skirt -- NOT. I swear Dan's an adult, he knows what he's getting into.

And so I feel bad for Rachel sort of -- only because Dan's a hypocrite sometimes. But hey, that was an easy breezy getting rid of yet another character. I wonder how this season is going to end, because it's gotten pretty crazy pretty fast and now I don't know what else they can do to make it wilder.

And because for some reason, I cannot stop writing about Dan, here we see Dan doing his moral compass thing by sort of outing Rachel as the evil devil behind it all to his beloved Serena, whom I feel he will be crawling back to very very soon.

And then of course, the requisite, "I'm-wrong-and-you're-right-dad-but-I'm-not-regretting-my-actions" speech which Dan will always give to Rufus. I wonder what Rufus is eating and where Lily is because if Rufus isn't attached to Lily's hip, she must be out of the country -- or checking out the spin-off of her youth!

Finally, because the writers sort of want to 'redeem' Miss Carr, they make her write a god-awful letter complete with quotes from famous writers that is supposed to make me weep, I guess. It really just made me laugh. Oh writers, Dan should be given a better storyline.

Serena needs a better gay-dar
No really, because she's currently crushing on the hottest Broadway director who happens to be not busy enough to direct a school play. Really. Serena, he screams gay, but then again she was with Dan, so her gay-dar must be really shifty these days. I love how she and V are totally BFFs now though. What a difference a season makes!

This dinner out was made of win though! Because only Nate could be jealous of someone gay and only Serena could be so oblivious to it all. When Serena started quoting lyrics from "Bette Davis Eyes" I was practically on the floor. I wish they would have played Leighton's version in the background. Now that's cross-promotion.

Serena's non-rehearsal-date with her director was hilarious too. I didn't think I'd ever be THIS entertained by Serena, but I am! Plus the fact that she hid her earpiece with her luscious blond hair is just so her! V feeding her lines was perfect too. If only he weren't gay. But oh wait, S, he is gay!

I love how Julian is totally into this play as he gives the cast a pep talk. Then again with Dan as your lead, you would need to give the troops a little push! The play has been hilarious though so far, though I'm not sure if it was meant to be that way.

Then the second act happens and Nate totally loses his shit and just goes all ad lib onstage to the chagrin of the Miss Queller an the very absent headmaster of St. Judes and not to mention this really 'important' critic. Wait, aren't we in a school play?! Is Dan competing with the HSM kids to get into Julliard too?!

But don't worry! The juxtaposition was brilliant! And we 'finally find out' that Julian is in fact gay. The look on Serena's face is priceless. It's like she's telling herself, "Again? You fall for the gay guy again!"

Blair finds her conscience -- eventually
No episode would be complete without Miss Blair's delusions getting the best of her. I have to say that she looks marvelous in her costume though. Constance really does put money into their school productions because the girls look impeccable.

I can't say the same for Nelly Yuki though cause her fat suit sucks. But who cares, right? She's getting into Yale anyway! And even Miss Queller can't do anything about it. Poor B.

Way to burn bridges though, B. You do know that S is the only friend you've got at this point! But oh wait, there's Dorota who will always love you, so okay, burn away the bridges Blair!!!

But wait, there's more! It's been Ms. Carr all along!!! She's the evil woman! And... Blair's grown a heart somewhere between plotting V's downfall to killing Nelly Yuki to finding out it was Rachel all along. It's good to know B's still got a soul. I love her too much.

I'm glad B didn't let S butter her up either. That scene at the bar was nice cause it made me see that B knew she was being horrible and it looks like she wants to change for the better. Well sort of. I just hope that something good comes out of this renewal.

That quick?! Carter Baizen (aka Sebastian Stan aka Leighton's real life flame) is back and it looks like he wants a little of Chuck's sloppy seconds. I don't blame him though, this isn't sloppy at all.

And for this week's WTF storyline courtesy of Chuck
No really, WTF?! This sex club thing is just whatever and the writers I'm sure realize this too seeing as they can't really show anything that happens in the sex club. So this is the quick removal of the storyline, which unfortunately for me, isn't quick enough.

Hailey/Elle is seeing Carter too cause he's rich but it never occurs to Chuck that maybe she's just using him too cause he's rich and not because they have some sort of 'connection.' I mean really Mr. Devious, you're falling for this when you could be with Blair?!

Oh dear! Carter is part of the sex club too! And he's going to do mean and dirty things to your virginal quasi lover, Chuck! You better seek help from the mysterious friend of your fathers! He could probably give you an in on the sex club!

Or not. Seriously Chuck. You just met this woman! Blair is there! Go work on that and not on this! She is just storyline fodder!!! Even your dad's friend seems to know, thus his non-compliance to your wishes. Oh writers, was there nothing else?!

Apparently, there is nothing else because after Elle/Hailey rejects Chuck's Sao Paulo plans for a better life elsewhere with her magical stash of cash from the same sex club that doesn't actually want to kill her (duh) we now back to emo Chuck who then realizes that Blair is the one for him.

Oh dear. I don't know how this one is going to pan out because obviously we just got the juice that Blair's going to be otherwise occupied by Mr. Baizen for now. Oh the drama these kids lead and yet somehow despite how preposterous GG was this week, I'm just so glad it's back, I don't have the heart to complain. Xoxo, I've missed you, Gossip girl.
Tags: gossip girl
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