Patty (woodycakes) wrote,

American Idol 8: The Lucky 36

They're already dressing alike[AI]
I honestly don't know where to begin just because I'm too freaking overwhelmed by the events this week.

First off, I refuse to call this the TOP 36, cause I don't think that all these people are really at the TOP -- talent-wise. Maybe controversial or favored or planted, but definitely not top in terms of talent.

And second. JAMAR WAS ROBBED. Of all people to get disqualified, it had to be a girl (Paciti) thus we can't get Jamar to replace her. Dammit! Why couldn't Nathaniel be disqualified?!? Bring back Jamar.

Lessons to be learned from Hollywood
  1. Don't have a best friend: Or if you do, keep on the down low. Idol is here to break up friendships. they will only take one of you in. Case in point Jamar and Danny; Nathaniel and that Jackie person.
  2. Don't have the same look or 'archetype' as someone. Ex. Alex vs. Cody (the young geeks); Kristen vs. Jen (the blonde girls); Michael vs. Matt (the blue collar boys who they let both through, as a sign of respect to all hard working Americans during this recession.)
  3. Be pretty. Simon likes pretty anyone and will help you get through despite lack of singing voice or whatever. Casey Carlson, Joanna Pacitti and those types will breeze through things with a good voice but fabulous looks
  4. Be Over the Top crazy. i.e. Tatiana Del Toro and Nathaniel Marshall; Norman Gentle. These guys are so bad and yet so good because they make for amazing television drama. I don't know how far the producers are going to let them 'stay' (considering this is all rigged) but every week someone good will be kicked out and these people will stay.
  5. Change your name if your name is Jamar. I still don't understand how they could NOT take Jamar and take so many other less stellar performers. I loved his "Hey There Delilah" and he remind us of Pharell. What is wrong with that picture?!
Here's the Top 12 I'll settle for if they have to be 6 guys and 6 girls -- with the hope that a 5 of these people make it from Round 1, which is IMPOSSIBLE as only 3 of them and possibly 1 more for the Wild Card will make it through. Oh Idol, you are making this hard for me, and yet making it interesting.

As long as Anoop and Danny (and okay Kai and Matt G) make it to the Top 12, the rest of the show can go to hell. I'm hoping that ride to hell has Tatiana and Nathaniel with it too.

American Idol Top Lucky 36

01. Anoop Desai I have nothing but praise for this guy. Anything he does, I will lap up. He makes me like "My Prerogative." He better make it to the Top 12 or Pamy will be broken -- Patrick Hall/David Radford style.
02. Von Smith I can't take your shouting. Really. Either sing normally or just get out. I cant' take this.
03. Alex Wagner-Krugman You're so cute! And you can sing! And you're not annoying! Check! Check! Check! I'm so happy he got in over Cody
04. Adam Lambert ? Pamy likes him, but I'm just still on the fence about him. If he makes it to the Top 12, I won't throw a fit, but I won't be rejoicing either. His rendition of Cher's "Believe" wasn't as original as he made it out to be.
05. Taylor Vaifanua ? I know I've seen her audition, but she still has to make an impression on me. I don't hate her though, which is a great start.
06. Jasmine Murray I don't love love her, but she's got a really good voice and again, not annoying -- which in this season, is hard to find. Her version Jordin's "Tattoo" was her worst though, and still better than others.
07. Arianna Afsar Just like Jasmine, not so hot about her, but I'll take her over others any day. She has to wow me though. Cause all I remember is cuteness from "Put Your Records On"
08. Casey Carlson She's HOT, I know PB and maybe I'm being too harsh about her because of her hotness. or not. She needs to "tattoo" the lyrics in her brain. She better be glad they didn't sack her for forgetting the lyrics
09. Megan Corkrey I know she's good, but for some reason, I'd only choose her if I HAD to choose 6 girls for the top 12. Cause right now, I'm leaning towards an 11-1 top 12 ratio of boys to girls.
10. Mishavonna Henson ? I don't remember her either, but her third round performance stuck in my head cause she had a really cute dress on! I can't pick her face from a crowd though -- literally.
11. Stevie Wright ? I'm so sick of Colbie Caillat's "Bubbly" and thus makes me annoyed at this girl, but I guess she's not on the total hate list. So I won't bitch too much.
12. Joanna Pacitti/Felicia Barton ✖/? if Joanna came through, it'd be an X just because she messed up her lyrics despite her being a 'plant.' But because she's disqualified, I'll give Felicia Barton the benefit of the doubt. However, I wish they would have replaced her with Jamar instead. Why isn't Joana Pacitti a boy?
13. Kendall Beard Not good enough at all. I swear, can we drop all the bad girls and replace them with Jamar instead -- this suggestion was by PB. I really do believe in it. See, I'm not super averse to country music, but I don't love it. And she didn't help make me love it either.
14. Kristen McNamara Another wasted slot. We love how Simon wanted to put Jen through instead despite her bad singing cause she was 'better' looking than Kristen. It's just that Kristen looked soooo... dirty? But okay, she has a voice.
15. Alexis Grace I love her! Not the strongest vocals but very likeable and her hair! I want her hair!!! I love how her daughter was groping her boob the entire time.
16. Scott MacIntyre ? Just because I want to see him perform and how he's going to connect with the audience. If he makes it, cool. I'm not his voice's biggest fan, but I'm not going to put him down just yet.
17. Lil Rounds I'm not a fan of the diva type, but Lil Rounds deserves to be in the Top 12 just for her voice. And girl can perform too. Her "if I Ain't Got You" was pretty good stuff.
18. Jesse Langseth I feel bad that Frankie (Amy Winehouse) didn't make it. I group her into the Jamar-sacrificial virgins. If we could give these girls up to bring back Jamar, I would.
19. Allison Iraheta ? I don't think I've seen her enough to pass judgment. Thus she will have to blow my socks off to make me like her.
20. Danny Gokey Pamy has dubbed him "Elliott Downey Jr." and I couldn't agree more. Mixing my two loves Elliott Yamin and Robert Downey and being amazingly pimped with talent to boot, this guy BETTER make it to the Top 12 along with Anoop. Cause first round is going to be tough and those two guys better make it through.
21. Ricky Braddy Who are you!? No really, I don't know who you are.
22. Matt Giraud "Georgia On My Mind" is difficult to sing!!! And he totally pulled it off with that voice and those piano skillz. I was floored. It was amazing. I so love this guy! Thank goodness he isn't in Round 1 or I I wouldn't know what to do with myself.
23. Ju'Not Joyner I preferred Jamar's "Hey There Delilah." I feel bad for him though cause Ryan said that Ju'Not's been 'flying under the radar.' Umm. Hello Producers, if you don't feature him, we won't see him! He's not flying under the radar, you're just not exposing him.
24. Jorge Nuñez ? I know he's got skillz, but I'm just not in love with him. I have this strong feeling he's going to make it though. Argh.
25. Brent Keith ? Again, I don't know who you are. He may have been featured, but I still couldn't pick his face from the pictures of the Top 36.
26. Stephen Fowler Pulling a Brooke White with his "Time Of Your Life" on the piano, I just can't see past that. I know it's nerve wracking, but get it together! I hope he gets disqualified too so that Jamar can replace him.
27. Nick Mitchell "Norman Gentle" ? Pamy and PB like him and I'm not averse to him. It's just that I could do without him. He's got a voice and he's got his gimmick, but I'm not on Team Nick or Norman.
28. Jackie Tohn OMG. I could care less about someone. And yet I don't even hate her. I just don't care about her enough to feel anything.
29. Tatiana Del Toro ✖✖✖ VFTW loves her which means she will go far. I just can't stand her. I don't care that she's got a voice. She's the poor man's Katharine McPhee for me. And don't even get me started on that shriek/hyperventilation/yell -- I want to strangle her everytime I see her. I don't think I've felt this much annoyance since Scott Savol.
30. Nathaniel Marshall ✖✖ Yes, boy can sing. But PB would also like to punch his face in. Another of the annoying ones -- it's too bad cause his voice ain't half bad. In fact, he's got presence. That's how he beat his 'friend' Jackie in their sing-off. Can't stand him though. I was disturbed by his "Disturbia."
31. Jeanine Vailes ? Again, who the hell are you?! I don't even know if I've already seen her before, but I just don't care. Jamar-sacrificial-virgin
32. Kai Kalama I heart him. I thought his voice is different and stands out. Though his Round 3 performance wasn't his best, I still have fond memories of his "Smoke Gets In Your Eyes." Wow me in the Top 36 performances Kai!
33. Anne Marie Boskovich Just because I had to fill up 12 slots and she happened to be a girl. After hearing "I Hope You Dance" a million times, I thought her version was just alright.
34. Kris Allen ? So freaking cute, it hurts. I don't think I've ever heard him sing or know if he's any good, but his face alone makes me want him in the Top 12. But if he has to go for Jamar and Danny to be together, then so be it.
35. Michael Sarver Cutest oil rigger ever. I know he won't make it far in the competition but he deserves a break. His voice is really really good!!! He made me feel less guilty about liking O-Town's "All or Nothing!"
36. Matt Breitzke ? I can't choose between these two but if I had to, I'd put Michael in. I love them both though! I wish more boys could make it through and then I could kick out as many girls as I want.
And so I round up my Top 12. The only problem is, most of them are from Round 1, wherein only three people (1 girl, 1 boy and the one with the next highest votes regardless of gender) gets through.

And here is my gender-insensitive, I-don't-give-a-fuck about the Rounds system Top 12. I'd have Anoop, Alex, Scott, Danny, Matt B, Kris, Michael, Matt G, Adam, Kai, Alexis and Meghan get in.

I don't know how they're going to manage to get an equal amount of boys and girls in with this new voting system, but we'll see how rigged Idol is this season. How about you guys, what do you think of the Top 36!? Any of your favorites make it? And who do you want to enter the Top 12. Idol has finally landed for me.

American Idol: Your Top 36 Revealed! [Vulture]
'American Idol' Recap: A Dramatic Weeding [EW]
Tags: american idol 8
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