September 15th, 2004

emma; only girl in the world

Changing for the Better -- Hopefully

PB just got shortlisted for Singapore today. I got home and saw the DHL package for him. This means he's even a step nearer to leaving me behind and that makes me feel like crap. I don't want him to go just yet. We're supposed to grow up together and all that shit and now he might actually be the first to leave us behind.

It really sucks, but I guess I'm going to have to start getting used to him gone. We had another PAEF seminar and Ms. Mila was nice enough to answer all our questions. My is set on a scholarship, but only Wesleyan gives the full scholarship and they only give it to the top two from each 11 countries in Asia. Beautiful. You need to be as smart as Chenelle to get it. This means, I have to take the SAT's in November. It's my last chance to take it because I missed the Sept. 7 deadline so I'll have to take it later.

The thing with Wesleyan is, they don't have the course I want. No communications. That's why I'm kind of thinking twice. Sure, it's a great chance of getting out, but would I really want what I'm doing? As much as I don't want to think about it, I have to. That's what sucks about senior year.

There's something about Tab that makes me smile. I saw him, even if it was only from a f a r. I'm quite fine with that, Gela. Rather than turn red and get really embarrassed, right? Still, that made my day even better. What a difference a glance can make.

Now that my brother has been shortlisted and I am more confused about what to do for college, I am going to list my 2nd Trimestral Resolutions. I have to do better this time around if I have any plans of getting any scholarships. So here are Cinco's Five Changes For the 2nd Trimester:

  1. I will only touch the computer when I have done all of my school work.
  2. I will be more attentive in class.
  3. I will prepare for my class the next day.
  4. I will not procrastinate my work
  5. I will stop dwelling on stupid things like Tab and petty problems with friends and instead I will concentrate my energies into getting into a great college and becoming a more self-actualized individual, because I highly doubt that Tab would ever go for an obsessive freak who doesn't have her priorities straight.

Lastly, I promise to follow my five resolutions.