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patty
woodycakes
27 September 2007 @ 09:46 pm
Que Horror!  
It's scary how I'm putting myself out there. Outside the comfort zone that I'm so used to. Outside the usual routine I follow. Outside the normal way I conduct myself. And yet, despite the unusual things I've been doing, somehow things feel natural.

It's scary how guilty I'm feeling. Despite the constant reassurances (by friends) that I'm not doing anything wrong, I somehow feel like I'm making a mistake. I feel like I'm hurting others in the process of making myself "happy."

It's scary how I don't seem to care that I am eventually going to be hurt by all of this. That I continue to go on this path knowing fully well that things are not going to go as I had conjured in my deluded little world.

driving in the rain has never been so enjoyable. choco cream snacks have never been so sweet. spanish has never been so useful.
 
 
cynical
cynical
Question - Old 97's
 
8 Responses « Comment
 
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[김정식 = L♡V3]: sigh.BoA[info]heartshapelove on September 27th, 2007 02:14 pm (UTC)
aww p i like ur quotes because one of my ates said something similiar to this:

I feel like I'm hurting others in the process of making myself "happy."


though i dont feel like im hurting others,...

feeling happy / making yourself happy / letting someone else make you happy is scary.
patty: [celeb] AH {tired}[info]woodycakes on September 27th, 2007 02:17 pm (UTC)
i dont know if i should have quoted someone, but i just wrote it out. haha.
advanced happy halloween. i'm scaring myself.
[info]selvercy on September 28th, 2007 01:52 pm (UTC)
i may not know what's going on with your love-life dearest, but a word of advice... liking someone and eventually loving them will involve a lot of risk taking from your part. :) take the leap. you may end up falling flat on your face, or someone might actually catch you... you'll never know unless you put yourself out there.
i'm basing it on my own personal experiences. as tacky as it sounds, i would have never met mark if i didn't go all cheesy-gross on myspace--looking for a friend to hang out with in the states. haha.
good luck with the ungoogle-able man, whatever his name is.
* big hug *
patty: [celeb] AH {tired}[info]woodycakes on September 28th, 2007 01:57 pm (UTC)
there are no leaps to take. thanks though.
this is far from love. a mere infatuation borne out of boredom.
still, thanks.
the LEXperience: hell yeah[info]_lexizzle on September 28th, 2007 06:15 pm (UTC)
puta! :D piensas más que debes. te diviertes con tu encaprichamiento efímero
patty: [celeb] AH {tired}[info]woodycakes on September 29th, 2007 04:19 am (UTC)
déjeme revolcarse en mi drama. usted tenía su parte.
ps. i used a translator. i can only say mi nombre es patty. :D
miss you love!
Pamela: blake[info]jamypye on September 30th, 2007 01:35 pm (UTC)
Eherm...you have a question for him? Ano kaya 'YAN?
patty: [celeb] AH {tired}[info]woodycakes on September 30th, 2007 01:45 pm (UTC)
it's funny. i was going through friendster pictures and it occurred to me i was looking at my future.
it's funny just how parallel our lives our, minus my academic standing that is.
but really, i was looking at their pictures and i was wondering whether i would be looking at a different set of similarly themed pictures one day. except i realized neither of them own friendsters or online lives.

oh the drama./